Awkward + Awesome

Awkward:

• When the pantless man around town that you've dubbed Red Shirt Man suddenly acquires a brown shirt instead. WHAT. 
• When you have to give greetings on Sunday afternoon. Which is your lazy day. Which means you don't have real clothes on. Awesome. 
• When you spend a serious amount of time wondering if your co-worker is pregnant. Are you? Aren't you? Some things are taboo across alllll cultures. 
• Awkward small talk on a SIX HOUR CAR RIDE. Jesus be near.
• Getting all prepped for your family's arrival only to have it delayed. YAY AIRLINES. 

Awesome:

• Quick phone calls with your best friend that make it seem like you aren't half way across the world. 
• People who know you + love you even when you feel funky and blehh. 
• My family being IN UGANDA WITH ME. 
• Togetherness with the family. 
• Safari and a mini- vacay for me/big vacay for the family!
• Early birthday celebrations when I've never really gotten birthday month before. 
• Boomerangs with the cutest kids on the planet. No, I'm not biased at all. 

Here's to being awkward + awesome always.

Family

This post is in perfect timing because TODAY my family lands in Uganda. TODAY TODAY TODAY. Life is so so good guys. I may just cry with pure excitement. I’ll be that weird Mzungu at the airport sobbing, don’t mind. 

Left to Right: Auntie Lydia (one of our house moms), Donald, Louis (one of our drivers).

Donald with his best friend Louis.

Lydia, Donald, Louis.

Sometimes family can be unconventional but it’s still just that- family. This is a picture of Donald, our youngest one at SGU with Lydia, his house mom and Louis our driver. If Donald and Louis are both hanging around in the village you can absolutely guarantee that Donald is less than five feet from Louis. Donald LOVES Louis. LOVES HIM. I would even go as far to say that Louis is Donald’s favorite human. While we were at the Lira Miracle Crusade in a crowd of thousands, I looked up to notice Donald missing from where he was standing in front of me. Of course the teacher in me started immediately panicking. As I turned around with a hint of panic in my soul I saw Louis nearly back at the bus to drop something off with Donald trailing behind him. Donald would follow Louis just about anywhere.  As they headed back towards us Donald reached for the hands of Lydia and Louis showing that family here at SGU is surely not conventional but it is absolutely family.

Friends at Saving Grace Primary School.

Miriam teaching Hannah to Dance.

Stephen with Val.

The boys with Deborah.

Deborah + Suzanne passing out lego cars.

Bella + Peter Dancing.

Val + Suzanne as Peter's family for his Engagement Ceremony.

What do you want most?

A good while back at the Crusade the Rabbi speaking asked the question: What do you want most tonight?

The answer came to me with a fierceness and tears in my eyes: I want togetherness Jesus. Be close and with me. And isn't that exactly what God wants us to want? He desires to have us draw near and be close more than anything. More than our sin. More than our fears, our hurts, our failures. 

That's such a growth moment. Normally my response would be something like I want tacos and sleep and AC and a pool and my friends and my family and my own space. But I don't need any of those things, though some days it feels like it.
 I need Jesus.
 It's pretty cool when what I want and what I need meet so clearly. 

xox.

The Damn M Word

Yes I used damn in the title, sue me. I’ve heard this multiple times from many, many different people since announcing this adventure to Uganda. “Wow so you’re going to be a missionary?” Ugh. I don’t think I have enough words to accurately describe my complete and total disdain for that question. I never know what to say. Yes? No? Maybe? Kind of?  I DON'T KNOW. I’ve answered it with all of those answers- depending on my mood honestly.

I had a moment where I was called out as a missionary by someone here and I literally looked at them and said, “Who me?” We looked at each other with serious confusion. Because here's the thing: I just don’t picture myself as a missionary. I'm just a girl who is following hard after Jesus.

When I picture a missionary I picture someone who has wanted to do this and live in the jungles since they were young, someone probably raised in the Baptist church (sorry but it’s true!), and someone who is a little bit hippy dippy and doesn’t mind living in a hut in Africa.

 Well let’s just have an honest moment shall we? THAT IS SO NOT ME. Sometimes I cuss. I need a taco in the WORST WAY.I love shoes. I’ve been dreaming about chicken buffalo dip and queso. I miss my closet (in the US of course- I don’t have a closet here) and every time I get an email from Target I’m on the verge of tears. So what am I doing?

When Paul talked about going on the mission field and Jesus told us to go make disciples of all nations they literally meant it: GO.  I also think that sometimes going means plugging yourself in to where you are right now. And well right now I happen to be in Uganda. Africa. Not in a hut [thankfully] but right next door.

But does my task look any different than when I was living in the U.S? No. Jesus doesn’t change his mission for us based on our location. Now yes, our day to day may look extremely different but the basics? Yeah that hasn’t changed. We’re called to love Jesus, love people, period. It does not make one iota of difference if I’m doing that in the streets of Orlando or on the red dirt roads of Uganda, it just matters that I’m doing it. We can all think of the people God is calling on us to love: our friends, neighbors, that co-worker that makes you want to rip your hair out, quit and running screaming out of the office. So with that aren’t we all really missionaries? Not that we all live in a hut or spend all our time screaming about Jesus [I’ve had one too many run ins with the preaching loudly into a mic on the street corner, sorry not my jam]. But aren’t we all supposed to love His people? So aren’t we all missionaries?

So I really hate that question, “So you’re a missionary?” I would never describe myself that way even though if we’re being honest we’re all missionaries to this world. If you believe in Jesus and trust in Him it will come out in your relationships, and isn’t that the best way to share your friendship with Jesus? So here’s to swallowing the fact that maybe, possibly, I sorta might be a missionary. It's okay though cause so are you.

 But I still hate that word.

Just some thoughts from your not so average missionary.

xox.

P.S- Sorry Mom about the damn word! ;)

Beauty.

One of my tasks while in Uganda has been to spend time with our SGU Children’s village. At first this is exciting; this is what I expected to do right? Then very quickly it seemed daunting. Only some of them remember me from my last foray into Uganda almost four years ago now, they mostly speak the local language so I usually have no idea what’s going on, and all the while still trying to find my place, my role, my responsibility here while in Uganda.

So with the complete and utter joy of someone who is definitely out of her element and desperate for something simple to define her role here I jumped on the task of interviewing our kids for sponsorship updates. The first groups of kids I interviewed took it 29384909 times better than I did. Mainly because I was nervous what do I ask, how do I say it, how will it come off and yet the kids, no matter their age, where content just to sit and talk with me. And they shared. They completely shared of themselves, their stories, hopes and dreams for the future. I found myself surrounded by a group of kids that had lived on the streets of Uganda, been through more than I can even fathom: facing starvation, abuse, disease, and were at one time hopeless and yet I’m listening to them share that they’re thankful. Thankful. [Meanwhile I'm still complaining about AC and a cooking stove]. They're thankful for what God has done and the changes they’ve seen in their own lives. Thankful that they have the opportunity to give back and made a world of difference in the lives of future generations. And they know it! Deep in their souls they know about the differences that can be made when you follow Jesus. They know a God who is mighty and powerful and loving and full of grace and redemption and mercy. The very same God that calls me to be a part of all that He’s doing here. The very same God that gave up His Son for me. I can’t even understand that. I truly honestly can’t understand it. And yet I don’t have to.

This post turned out to be nothing like I planned but I think it comes down to this: my job here is to love, simply because Jesus loves me. That’s my role. And every day it looks completely different and sometimes it’s hard and frustrating and gross but always beautiful. When you‘re doing the simple, yet immensely complicated work of Jesus it is always beautiful. Even when that beauty looks foreign to me or comes disguised as difficulties it is beautiful.

xox.

Cure.

Sometimes people are extremely complicated. And life, that's complicated too. Sometimes I'm convinced the best way to handle humanity would be to quit talking to them for a while. Gosh, I'm so thankful God doesn't do that with us. But, I have to say, I think I've discovered a cure.

I'm not gonna lie. Yesterday, I got some news that was needless to say, not so great. If we're being completely honest it was quite upsetting. So of course this morning, I woke up, immediately thought about it and then proceeded to feel it stomach ache and all [stress can really get to a person!]. But I had a thought through all of that nonsense. I once had a friend break-up with her boyfriend and in response she read through the Gospels and focused on reading about Christ's crucifixion for three hours. 3 entire hours. Wowza. Talk about perspective. Nothing can give you more perspective than reading about Christ loving you so much he died for your sins. So that is exactly what I did. Lettme tell you what, as upset as I still am and as much as the emotions will still arrive I can't get that out of my mind. It is something I've heard for years but something that I so easily forget in moments like these. Nothing seems as important when you're reading about your Savior being stoned for crimes he did not commit, but that you did. Perspective in a nutshell. I'm sure this will be happening consistently this week, and I have to say I'm thankful for it.

via.

So, thanks God for sweet reminders.

xoxo, Lo